Wednesday, 20 August 2008

Fall in Love?

I woke up this morning with a hurt on my head. I fell from my bed. When I told my mom about this: “Mom, I was falling” she replied: ”falling in love?” as she folded the newspaper in her hand. “Never mind.” I said.

Today I spent some few times looking for the definition of falling. The definition of falling is coming down freely under the influence of gravity (http://www.wordnet.princeton.edu/). Other person says that falling is a movement due to gravity. Isaac Newton taught us so. I believe that it’s the gravitation that makes me fell from my bed, but who makes me fall in love? is it the person? Or the gravitation? That stupid question popped in my head. I googled the word gravity, and look what I found: the force of attraction between all masses in the universe; especially the attraction of the earth's mass for bodies near its surface . Gravitation is a natural phenomenon by which all objects with mass attract each other, and is one of the fundamental forces of physics.

So fall in love, does gravitation make us fall in love? I don’t know if the rule of gravity is exist in our hearts. But the rule of attraction speaks loud in domain of fall in love. We use to be attracted first, before we fall in love. From what I’ve got, and from what I’ve thought, I assume that everyone has their own gravitation that makes another’s heart falls. Some people has the gravitation on their looks, some on their brain, some on their body, some on their cash, some on their reputation, some on their things, and some on their heart. If fall in love connects with these kind of gravitation, so which one attracts you the best?

The gravitation on looks attracts me the most, but sometimes it lets me down.
The gravitation on heart attracts me the best, it never let me down. Too bad, it doesn’t come easily…

Tuesday, 19 August 2008

I see it through my bathroom door

My bathroom door was locked this morning. I don’t know how did it happen or who did it, but it gave me such a big influence. I suddenly realized that a simple daily activity that we called “take a shower” is a big thing for me.

Let me tell you first about this bathroom. It is not too big, but it’s quite comfortable. It has two sides, the dry side and the wet side. The dry side is for the closet, and the wet one is for the shower. The shampoos and soaps are arranged neatly on a little glass shelf beside the shower, the dustbin is placed beside the clean ivory closet, and the colour of all the things in the bathroom are match each other. There, I can sing, I can dance, even write a blog. Finally I can tell you that it’s one of the inspiring places for me. I sometimes get my idea or decide something important as I have my private shower time.

Everyday, I usually start my day in the bathroom. As I take a shower in the morning, I think about my whole schedule for the day and arrange it carefully. And as I get home from my damn tiring activities, I usually use my bathroom not only for taking a shower, but also for having a private ‘me’ time after facing and meeting people all day long. So when its door is locked up, it somehow lock my head, my body, and my soul.
I CAN NOT ENTER MY BATHROOM TODAY.

I couldn’t resist how I miss the feeling of the falling water from the shower, the smell of the camomile soap, and the fresh of the anti-dandruff mint shampoo. I couldn’t stop thinking about my self naked, pure and wet, standing under the hanging shower. At 8 pm tonight, a key man came to my house just when I was about to leave for a meeting. He magically opened my bathroom’s door and my heart shouted: God bless the key man! I suddenly loved to ran directly to my bathroom, but the meeting was waiting for me.

Finally, I took a shower at 11 pm, just right after I had arrived home. This time, I enjoyed every moment with water, soap, and the sponge. I thank God that He has made water, and He has also made Anita Roddick, the inventor of Body shop with her harmless environmentally soap. I also thank God for giving us Mr. J.F Brondel who invented the idea of a modern bathroom.

Somehow this experience made me value things I had never counted before. I discovered the true meaning of “taking a bath” and how important is the shower activity for me. One thing for sure, how important is the water that God's given us freely, without charge. We should be thankful for this.
Hmph, this is stupid, but I can tell you that I can see it all through my bathroom door :)
Now tell me, what can you see through your door...

Thursday, 14 August 2008

WHY Do We Need Some Bad Situations

It’s started when your life is getting down, and your weight is getting up. I need myself to have some arguments why do I have to live just the way I want it to be. It’s easy to answer since everybody also wants to have a perfect life. Just imagine what could you ask more when you’re alive, have a boyfriend, and work in a excellent company with the dream position. It’s like everything so perfect, so well planned. But it doesn’t happen to me anyway.

Well, I just graduated from university, and all I’m asking is working as a writer. For your information I am jobless, loveless and unstable. I stay at home everyday, hang out with friends on week end and working as a part time teacher in a course centre three hours a week. Basicly, you can see why I said on the first line that my life is getting down and my weight is getting up.

I am looking for a job as a writer, and too bad they always want a person with plenty of experiences while all I can offer is just a stupid idea. They don’t like my words, my line. I think I can get it why the position is not coming to me. I am not that able to speak up more, to find better words, better idea or a better analogy than everyone else in the test room. I am not able to write the way they want me to.

I spent few hours today thinking about why I have to live a life just the way that I don’t want it to be. Why I have to work not as a writer and be happy with it. Why I have to live without a boyfriend and be fine with it, and why I have to get through the rain, the storm, the quake, and be able to stand still. Why can’t I give up.

As I remind my sleep over time with my eighteen years old cousin yesterday, I recall the way she acts and talks about her current life. I remember how afraid she was for being late for a freahmeats gathering at university (which somehow you call it stupid when you’re already in fourth smester), how na├»ve her vision about love she’s just had with her boyfriend, and how she hasn’t realized that sex is different with love. I’d like to tell her that so many bad people outhere with bad things in their hands that she hasn’t found and known yet. There are also as well so many useless activities outhere that she hasn’t recognized yet. I’d like to tell her everything, but I think I wouldn’t. I let her know it by herself, I let her get through what I’d been through. I can not skip her lesson and tell her what to do so she wouldn’t fall for same mistakes that I made. Cause she won’t get anything if she’s not hurt, if she’s always right, if she knows what she’s gonna face. Somehow I just shuted my mouth and listened to her, while my heart was saying “she says that cause that’s all she’s learned so far”.

Since experiences influence your ability to act and to speak, I realize why do I have to live just the way I don’t want it to be. Why do I have to have some bad times in my life. The more trouble you get, the more things come out from your mouth. (More books you read, more words are in your mind.) More storm, more rain, more quake you’ve been through, more story could come out from your mouth. So now, I need those bad times, I need those unstable moments to be able to speak up, to make my story. And if I have to work not as a writer right now (or for several times in the future), it’s a time to learn, so I can speak more later either in my column or in my article.

So how bout you, how do you see the bad times in your life...?