Deal with a 'Heartbreaker

Have you ever had a heartbreaker? I bet everybody has. And how do you deal with them? Do you leave them? Or revenge them? But what if the heartbreaker is your best friend? What are you gonna do? Will you leave them? Or still make a friend with them? The biggest broken heart’s moment in my life was made by my best friend. That time, I was having my biggest fear, that was: if my best friend has a girlfriend. Then it happened. That’s how he broke my heart. I left him with a hope that I would find a new life. But things were not so much better. I couldn’t keep myself thinking about him when I was down. I lost my best friend, but I didn’t lose the feeling. That time I realized that I was running away. I was running away from my biggest fear, from my phobia. From what I’ve known, we can cure our phobia by doing what we call as ‘little by little’. So, I decided that I want to cure mine. I decided to face my biggest fear instead of run away. And I hope by facing it, it will soon fade away. So I woke up in the morning and decided to make a friend with my forever heartbreaker: yes, my best friend. I called him and we started our new relationship. Yes, a friendly relation. I talked to him about the feelings I had for him, and he explained me about what was going on back days. It felt releave. Point one, accomplished. Talked about what’s in your heart for good. I felt no ashamed to tell him all the stupid things I did when I was in my deep depression. Well, he knew my version and that’s how we built our new relation. But what’s next? How could I know if my phobia has cured or not? Well, he has no girlfriend right now, but I’m hoping soon he will. I’d like to check my phobia, but what if it hasn’t cured yet? I started to ask him out just to meet or catch some movies. We did, but everytime we met, it took me two hours for feeling mello and think about what was going on. I replayed the scenes, and I found I’m still a lil bit in love with him. I don’t know what this thing people call love, but I gave my heart once to this person (he didn’t ask, I just gave it away) and it’s still in his hand. I think I’m on my way to get it back. I’m just not sure whether I’d taken it back, or I’m taking it back, but I have faith that I will take it back. Two hours mello is just seen as a progress for me. If it had taken me forever to get over this person, then now it just needs two hours. And plus, I don’t need to get over this lovely person, I just need to accept the situation, and deal with it. How do I deal with it? By facing it and living with it. So dear best friend, whenever you like to have a girlfriend or a wife maybe, I won’t go anywhere. I’m just gonna be there, and face it. And I think that’s how I will say goodbye to my phobia. =)